The odd argument is the sign of a healthy relationship where you both feel free to speak your own mind. Do you recover quickly after an argument? Couples who sort out their issues completely, do what it takes to repair the damage and then drop it and move on, are the ones who last the distance. Are you affectionate with each other?
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Kissing, hugging, snuggling up, holding hands, acknowledging your partner in public with some kind of physical touch — this is one of the most important cornerstones of connection. Do you put the relationship first? Sure, other things sometimes need to be prioritised work, sick parents or children, upset friends but couples with the highest relationship satisfaction say their relationship generally takes first priority.
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This also means making the time to do nice things together to make sure the relationship is nurtured and cared for. How many good times do you have compared to bad times? The healthy ratio, according to US relationship guru, John Gottman, is 5: You need five good times for every one bad time to be happy. Do you defend your partner in public?
The 21 questions that will reveal whether you're in a healthy relationship that will last for life
Relationship expert Tracey Cox understands that couples have nuanced habits in common. Do you both apologise easily? Pointing the finger of blame at each other with neither prepared to back down will catapult you into the divorce courts. Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?
Is your relationship more about competitive point scoring than wanting the other to be happy? This is a crucial component of happy couples: Not taking everything personally is a good sign.
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Do you expect your partner to fulfill all of your needs? However fantastic they are, no one person can satisfy all of our needs, all of the time. Happy couples realise this and have other sources of support and stimulation like friends, hobbies, family, career etc. Do you check in on a regular basis but also give each other room to breathe? Do you have pet names for each other?
Or you can make a pact with yourself to be warm, kind and respectful and make it work. No prizes for guessing which is going to score you more points with your significant other! If you have relationship problems, counselling helps. My book Hot Relationships: How to Have One also has lots of practical advice about love.
Are you in a healthy relationship?
The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. There may be some warning signs that your relationship is abusive. You can phone our information line on to find out about services in your community. The phone line operates seven days a week, from 9am to 11pm.
There are definitely warning signs in your relationship. Call our information line on to find out about services in your community. Take Quiz 1 again Take Quiz 2: In a relationship, I….
You might be surprised to find yourself in this category. Possible warning signs have been identified in your relationship. This means that some of the behaviours you are using could be domestic violence. Phone our information line on to find out about services in your community.
Encourage them to do the same. Remember, communication is always important when building a healthy relationship. Chat with a peer advocate for more information. If you scored six to ten points, it sounds like you may be seeing some warning signs and your relationship may be unhealthy.
Something that starts small can grow much worse over time. No relationship is perfect — it takes work!
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If you think your relationship may not be as healthy as you deserve, chat with a trained peer advocate to get more information. If you scored eleven to fifty points, you are definitely seeing warning signs and may be in an abusive relationship. Remember, abuse is not just physical. Learn about the different types of abuse and how to spot the warning signs.
If you scored more than 50 points, it is important to consider taking steps to ensure your safety. A trained peer advocate is available to work with you to create a safety plan that is tailored to your situation, and focused on keeping you safe whether you choose to remain in the relationship or not. Chat with a peer advocate to learn about your different options.
Everyone deserves a healthy relationship.